The Upside of Things

I had so many other things that I was gonna blog about tonight...btw, I really don't like the word blog lol. I was going to talk about Maddy, although I must admit now that I can't remember what I was going to say about her. I was going to give my opinion on the show Teen Mom. I was going to talk about how I was feeling today. These were going to be three seperate blogs..I know crazy right? Well, the calender thing that my mom got me for Valentine's day...I realized I hadn't read what the thought of the day was for today. Before I tell you what it says, I will give a brief description of my day. I decided to get smart and see what I need to make production wise for today and tomorrow in order to meet for the week. I was a little stressed over it, especially since I basically have no work. I came with the attitude that i WOULD meet production and I'm happy to say that I actually went a little over what I had to do in order to meet, so if I can meet tomorrow then I will have succeeded and no emails from my manager. Anyways, I still feel a sense of sadness over the breakup, but I was able to focus a lot more at work and I actually only ended up having one crying spell. I feel as if I am ok with my life moving in the direction it is even though I have no idea where I'm really going. I still have moments where I want to text him or tell him something, but that is starting to go away. I do find myself thinking about him almost every minute of the day and I think I will do that for a while before it starts to go away. I woke up this morning with a little regret over last night's blog but decided it was good for me to tell how exactly how I was feeling and I really believe it is going to help me heal a lot faster than if I just kept that to myself. So that is my day in a nutshell. After I got done with work I saw my calender laying on the floor. I decided to read today's thought and instantly knew that was God talking directly to me. It says, "Don't worry about seeing or understanding what the future holds. God wants you to trust Him as He leads you, even though you can't see clearly ahead. And don't be overly concerned about fully comprehending the past. Only He knows the whole truth about it, anyway. You have Him now. He is your light. And that's all that matters." My analytical mind starts to instantly have questions such as what does it mean for me when it says, "don't be overly concerned about fully comprehending the past. Only He knows the whole truth about it, anyway." It may mean absolutely nothing, but it also might mean something. For now I am just going to say it means that my thoughts were right in the beginning, I just don't know the full details. If that is the case then I know I will be 100% ok. I think I will read this over and over because it really pertains to my situation. I want to be in the center of God's will and I plan on keeping my focus on Him, and Maddy of coarse. This inspirational thought has just made me so happy because I am feeling hope again. Even though I feel completely lost in life it's a nice reminder that God is leading me and all I have to do is trust Him. That sounds so easy, but it's not always so easy because we don't see the big picture like He does. I am so thankful that the Lord is in control of my life. I just want to end saying thank you Lord for loving me and guiding me and being patient with me. I definitely can't see the road ahead of me very clear, but I will do my best to put 100% of my trust in you.